Phashionable is back!

From the sunny hills of Hollywood to Orange County to the beautiful San Francisco Bay, I'm back to give you all things awesome to awfully roach. And it could not have come at a better time, because tis the season to freeze your butt off in a hoochie dress while standing in line for a hip holiday party. Unlike guys in their long tacky leather jackets over their striped black button-ups, girls are never, ever, ever aloud to wear a jacket or any type of outerwear that can 1) warm them up or 2) cover up their hoochie dress. It's the rules--lest she be destroyed. What's even more irritating isn't the actual cold, but those same stupid guys in their leather jackets that ask you if you're cold. YES YOU IDIOT, OF COURSE I'M COLD--GIVE ME THAT HIDEOUS JACKET!

Word to the wise guys, if YOU are cold standing out there, then the girls next to you in their polyester slutty dresses are cold too. There, now you know. So ladies, if you're going to have to suffer might as well do so in a hot beaded halter dress by BCBG for $308.00. It's white, with a halter neck and beading in the breast area. What more can you ask for? Throw on a santa hat, and bravely stand in that line with your unsuspecting boyfriend with the knowledge that even though you're freezing cold, that girl next to you in red and green polyester is way more roach then you--which honestly, was the whole point anyways.