A couple days ago I ran into my friend Joseph on the street that I had known many years ago. It was one of those amazing conversations that you have on a sunny day, where you catch up on all the things that you've done for the last three years. He was apparently a karaoke star in San Mateo now and I was about to take a last weekend trip that won't involve baby poop. So lots of exciting news. We talked for 20 minutes and then we hugged, made empty promises to get together soon and then went our separate ways. Except that when I left, I realized that I was not talking to my friend "Joseph"; I was talking to my friend "Isaac"! What the hell, I had been calling him Joseph for 20 minutes! "Joseph, you are so funny!" "Omg, Joseph, I totally remember that night!" "Joe, you're the best, let's get drunk on Rosé soon!" God bless Isaac, he didn't even have the heart to tell me when we left each other that I had called him the wrong name the whole time. That will, of course, be the last time we ever see each other, because there's really no explaining away the fact that I had forgotten his name and then randomly just made up some other name to call him. I mean what kind of friend is that? And what would I say the next time I see him? Oh hey, about the last time we spoke, sorry I forgot your name and then called you by some completely different name because that's the first thing that popped into my head?! I think it's better to let this friendship die than to put ourselves through that awkwardness. #notworthit.
I am so happy to be able to share some of my maternity photos. Maternity photos can be tricky because although you're going to be a mom, I didn't want to look like a mom ready for a stroller and vinyl bag that unfolds three times to catch vomit and poop. I also wasn't ready to go into a forest wearing a pink fairy silk crepe gown blowing in the wind and a flower crown as if I was going to give birth there and have butterflies pull my baby out. Unless the butterflies have a gigantic needle that goes into my spine with drugs in it, I don't think that's how my birthing story is going to end. I also decided against anything typical of a maternity shoot like belly kissing, hands into hearts, baby blocks, walking on the beach, and any baby items that were not gold. So, instead of the traditional "I'm hanging out in the woods with my husband on a Saturday morning" maternity shoot, I opted for something more me. I just wanted to look like I was walking around the city with my husband. In a sheer ballgown. And heels. And full make-up. And jewelry. Coincidentally, I'm holding my belly a lot. And I just happen to be pregnant. I think we captured that.
Photos by Aika Cardin. Thank you Aika for making us look so good!
Just wondering if you can spot me in this month's People StyleWatch. Thank you People For such a great feature!!! Check me out while you're paying for your groceries because I'm on newsstands now!
I know this may come off completely rude and antisocial, but I absolutely hate talking to my uber/lyft/taxi driver. It's like I'm in the Twilight Zone of chit chat--and I hate chit chat. I hate chit chat with people I know, let alone people I don't know who are driving me 2 miles to get to the mall. It's like, yeah, the weather is nice, no I don't watch the Giants games, the traffic IS really bad today, and yes, AGAIN, the weather IS nice, and no, your really offensive joke wasn't funny, but I'll nervously laugh anyways because I don't want to talk you about the "worthless busses in the city shuttling old Chinese people around, taking up all the street space." You mean shuttling them HOME FROM WORK?! Or, even worse, when your chit chat turns serious and your driver starts crying and before you know it you're comforting her about that time she had to drive a woman only two blocks and it was just such a short distance to call a driver and then something about being from Croatia. I just wanted a ride to Chipotle. So don't be offended if you pick me up and I'm wearing headphones, but you can't hear anything coming out of them. That's because there's no music on. I'm not listening to anything except the awkward silence of you taking me to my destination.