An Engineer's Fashion Faux Pas

I have been living in San Francisco for over a year now and I have to tell you, it's fascinating.  I'm not going to bore you with where to find the best crepes or brunch places in the city, because nobody cares and I have discovered something far more interesting.  I live in Nerdville, USA.  But not the kind of nerds that fantasize about Manga chicks, eat Cheetos and drink Mountain Dew out of a two-liter bottle.  I live in the land of Engineering Nerds--a single gal's goldmine because they're so reliable and safe, and most importantly have tons of engineering money that they are dying to spend.  The drawback: they look like your 57 year old father.  Investigating deeper, I noticed that all engineers own only one outfit. Their uniform of choice always consists of a polo TUCKED IN to their pleated khakis,  Kenneth Cole square-toed black shoes, and the black Banana Republic jacket from 1997--the last year they cared about what they looked like.  And what if they run out of polos you ask?  Not to worry, they always have their company t-shirts to fall back on!  Yes!  Their supplemental clothes are clothes that say Microsoft or Google on it!! It's like they've voluntarily decided that they never want to have sex and pinned their own Scarlet Letters onto their polos.  It's so scary.  So, engineering nerds, I beg of you to stop tucking in your polos and wear any clothes that have the words "Apple", "Google" or "Yahoo!" on it, because it's not sexy.  In fact, it's kinda creepy. Take a cue from that chic nerd pictured on the right. Take time away from your World of Warcraft or Dungeons and Dragons, go out there and get yourself some cardigans and Chucks!  This world could be your oyster if you just looked cooler and stop dreaming about Middle Earth--where all the Hobbits were suspiciously effeminate.

Furry Vests: Cute the Chewbacca Way

Before I loved them, furry vests used to confuse me.  They're sleeveless and have massive amounts of fur covering just the front--like Chewbacca shaved his arms or something.  But now, I see the cuteness.  It's not Chewbacca at all!  It's totally Alexis Carrington circa Dynasty whilst vacationing in Aspen!  In short, furry vests are chic and ritzy, and will automatically make you feel like you are better than everyone else in the room.  And if you can't afford to buy the real thing or you don't to wear dead animal fur, then there's this really cute Juicy Couture fur vest that is cute and also affordable.  Happy hunting!

Burberry Princesses Unite!

It's weird, I myself have never been fascinated by this weird over-priced plaid crap.  And never would I ever have declared myself a Burberry Princess.  Louis Vuitton Princess, Gucci Princess, Chloe Princess--yes.  But not Burberry.  I mean, I know we all remember what Burberry used to be like--roach-ass plaid for old ladies who smelled like White Diamonds.   However, today I eat my words.  I LOVE Burberry.  I love it so much now that I want to be draped in all things Burberry.  Hats, scarves, galoshes, bags, you name it, I want it, and I will wear all these items as one ensemble like a demented ritzy lumberjack.  I am completely obsessed right now with the above Burberry bags. They are just cute and pretentious enough to hold my adorable Mac laptop.  We loves it!

Cheapest, Most Amazing Gold Lame Holiday Party Dress Buy of the Week!

How amazing is this dress from, wait for it...FOREVER 21!!  It's $22.00, gold lame (la-may), with gold lame flower embellishment.  The trifecta of gold lamay-zingness!!!  If this does not scream holiday party, I don't know what does.  I want it, and I want it now! And it's the price of two lunches, which is perfect because you're not going to need lunches if you want to fit into this dress.  Happy Holidays!