Style The Bump?

Alright, I want to preface this by saying that this is not going to turn into a "mommy" blog or "the beauties of pregnancy" blog now. In fact, I actually have very little to say about pregnancy other than everything that you've heard about it is true; especially the sucky parts. But, we all get through it. I do, however, have a lot of thoughts on maternity wear and baby bags, and those thoughts are mostly "yuck". I know everyone is trying to make it all hip with all the side ruching for the belly and extra fabric and Rachel Zoe. But dear god, why is it the second a once young, hip and chic woman gets pregnant she automatically has to buy "mom tops" or "mom pants" or "mom dresses" that are all boxy and paisley and high-watered? Why is she forced to go from carrying her Celine luggage bag to carrying something called a Petunia Pickle Bottom in all patterns of ugly pink and florals? I get it, we need a thousand pockets to keep baby stuff, but I don't get why I have to be reduced to carrying something so ridiculously named and so incredibly vile looking. Can't it just be black with an organizer and a thousand pockets hidden inside? I hit rock bottom when I was shopping for a bathing suit at Nordstrom and the saleslady took me from the cute neon green bikini section to show me something called a "tankini". Ummm, no. Even though it sounds like a cocktail a 22 year old with MTV abs would order on Spring Break at Cabo Wabo, it is SO NOT. So, I've decided to just stuff myself into normal clothes and look like an inappropriate sausage. And there you have it, how I #stylethebump. 

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  Hermes and Vita Fede bracelets, Chanel bag, Cartier and my own rings

Hermes and Vita Fede bracelets, Chanel bag, Cartier and my own rings