Thank you People StyleWatch for featuring me in your May issue!!! I can't believe I get to say this, but I'm on newsstands everywhere. I'm not saying that this officially makes me a model. But this kinda makes me a model! :)
Over-Share
Zara tank, Club Monaco skirt, Zara mules, Ray-Ban sunglasses, Shopbop Basic bag
I have never been one to complain about people's over-sharing on Facebook. In fact, I'm pretty nosy, so I actually kinda love spying on what you're doing and who you're doing it with. I'll probably even spread some rumors about you based on your stupid photos. However, today has changed everything. I woke up to the most horrifying status update that made me question all human decency. It was a picture of a toilet bowl with human feces and pee. At this point, can we all agree that this is the most vile, disgusting and wildly inappropriate picture for a Facebook "status update?" That this is taking "status update" much too literally? Would it change your mind if I said the feces belonged to a child? Or that this photo was posted by a mom about her kid's first shit? I DIDN'T THINK SO! FB moms, I love you, I may even love your kid, I may even find some of those kid photos amusing, but lets save those shit and piss photos for your own personal collection. I think I can speak for everyone in the world--including your own kid, when I say, NOBODY CARES! Just because this poop is from a kid does not make this by any means "ok." I mean, if an adult posted up their bowel movement, they would be ostracized. So, I think that we should make it rule to apply adult standards for children when it comes to FB updates about poop, piss, private parts and biting your feet. I guess the last one's ok, it's just boring.
Hermes bracelet, Cartier, Baublebar and Brandy Pham rings
Farmer's Market or Rodeo?
Madewell chambray shirt, Citizens of Humanity jeans, Pour La Victoire shoes, Shopbop Basic bag, Ray-Ban aviator sunglasses
Do you sometimes put on an outfit thinking that it is perfect for going to get some wine and cheese at the farmer's market, but really it was perfect for the rodeo? Well, there I was, an Asian cowboy carrying my cute wicker bag full of Brie, designer honey, and a loaf of cranberry walnut artisinal bread. What's funny is, it looked slightly less weird than it sounds. Still pretty weird, but not as weird. At least I had the sense not to wear a hat.
Cartier and Jules Smith rings, Anarchy Street, House of Harlow and Jules Smith bracelets, Michael Kors watch
Poncho
Club Monaco poncho, Citizens of Humanity jeans, Pour La Victoire shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, Mark and Graham bag
Some genius decided to fashionize ponchos, which are historically giant blankets used to keep you dry from the rain. Nowadays, these ponchos are neither water resistant, nor do they keep you warm. Which means that they're basically pretty useless as ponchos, but are totally amazing as giant blanket-shirts.
So do it, because "Mama said poncho out!" Ok, I'm gonna stop while I'm ahead.
Hermes, Stella and Dot, Anarchy Street bracelets, Cartier, Brandy Pham, Baublebar rings
