I don’t know about you, but I used to think that Theory was just an over-priced Banana Republic. It’s like, you’ve seen one Theory blazer and skinny black jeans and you’ve seen it all pretty much. But, after seeing these two outfits at Theory, I change my mind and I kinda think Theory is awesome. First, I present this gold skirt. It’s gold and it’s short, need I say more? Second is the ruffle shirt dress. It’s a ruffle shirt dress! I don’t think that a dress could get any better unless it was a GOLD ruffle shirt dress that made you feel like an executive cleopatra. Who knows, it still might happen. Theory, bravo you’re finally a step up from Banana.
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Halloween is the time to dress-up like a total whore and have it be completely expected. It is so expected for girls to be whores that everyone looks down on you if you ever showed up to a party in a normal costume. Last year I was Hermione from Harry Potter, and not sexy Herminone–just normal Herminone. Needless to say, wearing a a full cape in British children’s school clothes was not sexy. So, this year I have decided to embrace my inner whore and be a whore/bear. I will don this adorable bear hat and complete my ensemble in the above gold bikini. Let me know if you don’t like it, because they also have mouse hats, elephant hats and bunny hats. All of which match my gold bikini.
I hate winter. I hate boots cause they make me look like I have Ethiopian legs inside a giant’s shoe. I hate wearing sweaters and jackets because they hide all the pretty things about me. But now, winter is upon us and for the next three months I have to torture myself with wearing all kinds of stuff that hides my bust and my booty. In my desperate search for cute winter-wear I happened upon this really updated grandma sweater from Express. It is so warm and soooooo cute! With leggings or jeans, this wrap is very sensible. I already have it in grey and white–and soon, in zebra.
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What ARE these? I mean, I think they’re shoes, but they can also be BCBG’s weirdest mistake. First of all, are those boots or is that a funky cow hoof? If they are in fact boots, then the person wearing them has a huge surprise because they’re feet are now going to look like funky cow hoofs. And are those pumps supposed to have that weird piece of cement stuck to it? It’s hard to believe that BCBG, the same designer that designs Herve Leger and 
This is my new love. I am obsessed with this purse, except that I have refused to believe that I could love a quilted purse that is not Chanel. I feel like I’m cheating! I want put it on the record that Chanel will always be the only quilted purse with chain handles that I will spend $3,000.00 for. With that being said, I would also spend $1,100.00 for this Marc Jacobs quilted bag. It’s so amazing, because it’s chic and edgy at the same time. Isn’t it the BEST?! Damn you Marc Jacobs, damn you. First the mouse shoes, and now you’ve made me a cheater!
I think that we can all agree that Marc Jacobs is a genius. His quilted handbags are beautiful. His clothes are always edgy, youthful and fun. To top it off, Marc Jacobs has kept Louis Vuitton relevant and modern as its creative director, when LV could have easily slid into the trenches of boring old lady bags like Ferragamo bags have. However, there are times when even I do not understand MJ’s fashion risks. For example, mouse shoes and one of the ugliest old lady bags I have ever seen in my entire life. As edgy as I think that I am, I’m definitely not edgy enough to wear mouse shoes. And that bag, I cannot comprehend it at all. It’s one old lady bag on top of another. It’s not even like it’s Marc Jacobs bags for Target, this bag is the real deal and it’s over $2,000.00 to buy it. So, this is where I’m not sure if Marc Jacobs is so genius that I don’t understand him the way that I don’t understand why Van Gogh chopped his ears off; or if these mouse shoes are exactly what they seem: really weird and ugly. Right now I will reserve judgment because these mouse shoes might be totally cute as part of a whole ensemble…an ensemble where the rest of your outfit is made of cheese.
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